Allison’s Eclectic Expatiation

There are so many skills I would like to possess.  I feel like right now, I know how to DO a lot of things, but I don’t excel at any of them.  I used to be able to play the guitar, but I didn’t really know much “about guitar”.  And I couldn’t master bar chords.

I know how to knit, and knit good quality items, but WHAT I know how to knit is limited to scarves and blankets (basically anything in a box shape).

I know how to take pretty nice photographs, but I don’t know much ABOUT photography.

I am a decent artist, but have never had any training, and don’t know many “tips”.  I just draw.

It’s that last one that I’m actually going to do something about.  In the fall, after lots of talking about it, I’m taking the first steps into looking into graphic design as a career.  I’m a little scared.

For as long as I can remember, I have considered myself an artistic person.  I used to fill up pages and pages with drawings of women in fancy clothes (when i was very little, I wanted to either be an actress or a fashion designer).  I painted designs on my fingernails and made collages out of old magazines.  I would draw on my hands in school, on my friends hands, a precursor to me designing my own tattoo that I got when I was 18.

As I got older, my artistic endeavors became secondary to everything else. I rarely sketched for fun, usually making little cartoon strips for my boyfriend based on stupid inside jokes (one involved pumpkins wearing high heeled boots.  Don’t ask).  I’m pretty sure that those drawings are some of the few remaining things he kept from our relationship.

I’ve always known that I have wanted to work in a creative field, but I didn’t want to have to bank on my creativity (which is why being an author always scared the bejeezus out of me.  What if I wasn’t having an “inspired” day?), but to be able to create, if that makes any sense.

So for now, I am waiting impatiently for my pre-requisite courses to start in a month.  I am taking Drawing 101 and Studying 2 Dimensional Shapes.  I don’t really know what to expect with the latter, and with the former…I’ll be putting my money where my mouth is, so to speak.  And I’m nervous.

In the meantime, I have been trying to do more with my photography, occasionally making trips out for the sole purpose of taking pictures (like the Griffith Observatory and Venice Beach)

On Saturday, I did my first photo shoot with my friend Alexander.  He needed some shots for his modeling portfolio and some new headshots as well.  It was a new experience for me, as I’m usually more adept at shooting still items (found art and found objects in particular.), and dont have a ton of experience telling people how to pose.  But it was great practice, and I think they came out well.

The biggest problem I had was in dimly light places like, here, in the North Hollywood Metro station:

This is the only shot that came out even remotely well,and that was only after adjusting the levels afterwards.  With a flash, they came out looking too…cheap? (for lack of a better word).  The contrast was too sharp, they look like snapshots, not like photos.  And with the flash off, they were just too blurry.

I don’t know how much it has to do with how I am shooting, or needing to get some better lenses (right now I am solely shooting with the stock lens that came with the camera.), or hell, just learn more about photography.  I’m already using this as an opportunity to get more familiar w/Photoshop.  And I’ve lined up 3 more friends that I am going to take shots of in the coming weeks (or as time allows).  It’s nice to have a hobby.  Something besides work and school and “social life”.  I read constantly, but I never counted reading as hobby, more as something I just couldn’t live without.  This is a project.  Something to work on, and focus actual energies on.  Makes me feel like a more well rounded person.  Which is really the name of the game in Allison-land.

Man, I love food.

This was my dinner tonight.  Vegan nachos.  I actually made some very yummy very healthy eggplant and chili stir fry for the week, but by the time I was done, I wanted nachos.  So I gots nachos.

That picture is AFTER me and my roommate demolished half of it.  (Though he didn’t like the jalapenos. And he’s from the south! WUSS!) Am now full. So deliciously, delightfully full.

People should really learn not to make food eating bets with me. I went out to dinner with some old family friends, and my friend’s uncle bet me $5 that I couldn’t eat and swallow 5 saltines in under a minute. Oh foolish man. Allison eats. That’s what she does.

Dude. I’m not a gambler by nature. So if I bet you something? You best be sure that I AM sure that I am gonna win that shit.

ESPECIALLY when it comes to eating contests.  I may be vegan, but I’m also 5′3″ and 170 pounds.  You figure it out.  Haley and I were both lamenting how people seem to think we eat nothing but rabbit food (“You don’t eat meat OR dairy?  Theres nothing left!”  or “So do you just eat salads for every meal?”, and so on and so forth.)

I consider myself a foodie.  Even after becoming vegan, I still watch every episode of “Top Chef”.  I respect good quality ingredients and good quality food.  And I make so much more interesting food now than I EVER did when I ate meat.

For example, last night Lainey’s parents and sister took she and I out to dinner for pizza, and I ordered a cheese-less one.

It was delicious. Basil, garlic, mushrooms, sun dried tomatoes, artichoke hearts and spinach. No soy cheese, no fancy vegan alternatives. Just good vegetables w/some marinara sauce on some yummy bread.

Thats all you need, people!

….I just fell asleep.  Food coma.

…which is a shame, because Allison be wanting to saute some eggplant.

Happy Friday.

Why is it whenever I have clever insightful things I want to write about, as soon as I get out of the shower, they float away. Or get rinsed away?

I am actually very depressed that I can’t afford to see Regina Spektor at the El Rey next week. She NEVER comes to L.A.

This song makes me think of falling in love for the first time. The music and tonality reminds me of the feeling of glee and excitement that came along with falling in love at the age of 19. The lyrics remind me of everything else after. Is it odd that there is a song that “makes me think of him” that I didn’t hear til over a year after we broke up?

He’s been on my mind the last few days. Weird residual hurt feelings that I haven’t felt in a very long time matched with simply missing someone who used to be my best friend. I am not even sure if the person out there with his name and face is even that person anymore (I hope he is)…but I do miss that person. Very much.

This heat is affecting me in a very odd way, and driving me a little bit insane. I react to things differently, my hair is frizzy (the source of all my powers! NOOOOOOOOO!!), and all in all it’s causing my brain to go a bit wonky. I don’t like it. I don’t like it one bit. October cannot come fast enough.

I leave you with another Regina Spektor song. This album lives on an endless loop in my car at the moment:

(man, i really want to see her in concert. Few people’s music has as strong an effect on me as hers does.)

On a Saturday like this, sometimes all you can do it sit.

The Los Angeles heat makes productivity a nice idea in theory, but not something that will be implemented anytime soon.

You stay inside, where the heat is lazy and still, as opposed to the almost stabbing like heat that waits for you outside.  You stay inside, because the neighborhood is having a gigantic yard sale, and you cannot be trusted to not spend your last $35.  You need that for gas.  And soap.

Clothes that need to be put away.  You take a nap on them.

Sometimes, when it’s this hot, and you feel this sweaty and this gross, you just sort of sit in it.  Feeling more and more gross, you sweat and sit in your own filth, so that a nice shower just feels that much nicer.

You listen to your friend talk about his ex, who just got engaged.  You feel bad for him.  She shouldn’t be the one who gets to be happy.  Even if its a happy charade.  All this talk about exes and their new relationships is not something you want to be thinking about at this particular moment.

Sigh.

You’ve bitten off all your fingernails, so they are super short.  You are very aware of the skin on your fingertips now.  You feel declawed, almost impotent.

Stretch.

The boy flies back in tonight.  You are excited, nervous.  Him leaving for 2 weeks after only 3 weeks of dating put things on a weird hold.  Picking up where you left off, making sure the pilot light is lit before you turn on the stove…you’ll just have to wait and see.   But hey, there is something to look forward to on this exceptionally hot Saturday after all.

Note:  I took my final already, and I KICKED IT’S ASS.  Am very very happy.

I was a little too turned on watching “Citizen Kane” in class last night.  Orson Welles, super hot, insanely brilliant, and TALL.  Hummuna.  Seriously.  I bookmarked a couple books on him in GoodReads, as I’ve become more and more intrigued by this man that I would have most definitely had a picture of on my bedroom wall had I been alive in the 1940’s.

Anyways, I have my final today.  The first test I did well, the 2nd test I did NOT well (couldn’t keep straight the different types of shots and lenses and technical jargon.  Of course, being a former drama nerd, I did well on the prior test, which was all about acting styles and genres), so it’s all about this 3rd and final test, which discusses the ideology and critiques of films.  I feel pretty prepared, though I could be more so (and you never quite know what is gonna stick when you have that scantron in front of you.)  There is also an essay question where we have to break down the synthesis of a film.  I chose “Pieces of April” because, well…I own it on DVD.  Watched it on the roommate’s television last night (after listening to him complain about it’s “vagina cinema”), so I could get some ideas.  I’m actually really excited about that part of the test.

And then I have a summer break.  Kind of.  Still have work, of course.  And I plan on catching up on some reading, and not getting bogged down by silly mindless distractions (spending too much time on Facebook, rewatching television shows I have already seen).  I want to get more familiar with Photoshop before I start my design classes in the fall, and lose the 5 or so pounds I gained since I started class (which can be blamed on no more morning walks, and the late night, almost always unhealthy snacking I do when I get home from school).
Allison: I do not approve of this heat
Dan: vapors?
Allison: my heavens, yes
Dan: do you declare?
Allison: Why yes, yes I do.

I can probably blame the heat for my malaise and subsequent fattyness as well.  Oy.

One of the things I love the most about my friends is that they are totally down with little day adventures.  My friend Mitch seems to be the most down these days, accompanying me for picture taking at the Griffith Observatory

and Venice Beach, which is just packed to the gills with found art and interesting treasures.

BTW, I do NOT remember there being that many medical marijuana dispensaries along the boardwalk. It was kinda ridiculous.

I also went to Animal Acres on Sunday with Haley (one of the friends who helped me become vegan), and one of my best friends from high school, Tera (who is becoming a vegetarian!  Woot!).  Haley and I had been there before, and volunteered for them at assorted events.  Tera had never been, and it was an absolute blast

But OMIGOD THE PIGS.

They were nuzzling and cuddling and just the biggest lovebugs on Sunday.  Tera at one point remarked how weird/awesome it was that they would just roam around, interacting with the humans like it was no big deal, relaxed and happy.  Thats the difference between a place like Animal Acres and a regular farm or even a petting zoo (which is usually a bit high stress for the animals, who are pawed by small children, and carted to and fro).  The animals at Animal Acres know that they are in a safe environment, and as a result, are able to live the way they are supposed to, and it’s a great chance for people to see how affectionate a turkey or a pig could be! (I would never in a million year expect for a turkey to sit right by my feet and let me pet him for as long as I pleased.)

But the pigs…the pigs were extra lovey on Sunday.  As a result…we spent a lot of time with them

Needless to say, it was a great day

At this point, its 12:30, and I have work in 8 hours.  I am literally just wasting time just because I can.  What a goober.

Anyways, off to bed with me.  I have a feeling my early morning walk wont be happening , but I can always go on Saturday before yoga.  I have a feeling this is going to be a good weekend (which may or may not have to do with C, man of the moment, getting back into town).

Ahhh to have a lunch break where I can actually relax instead of study!

I am at that point on a sleepy Sunday morning where I am trying to decide whether or not to go back to sleep.  So, I am compromizing by burying myself in pillows and blankets, enjoying how well the AC in my studio works, and sipping on a Sugar free Red Bull (it should have been green tea, but that would require effort, and I’m just not there yet.

Today’s batch of Sunday Secrets once again revealed a secret eerily close to my own life:

I don’t know how this happens.  My studio is literally ONE BIG ROOM (and a bathroom that really is, as the British would call it, a “Water Closet”), and so far I’ve misplaced one black shoe, my old point and shoot camera (which I haven’t used in a while since I got my Canon.), and my GLASSES  (Mom is gonna kill me if she reads this, as those were my birthday present.)

All of these have to be in my home because, the last time I saw my camera, it was at home, and I can’t physically leave my glasses or ONE of my shoes somewhere (I need the glasses to see, and 2 shoes to, well, walk.), so they HAVE to be in my home, or in my car.  the fact that I can’t FIND them, after looking what I feel is “everywhere” is starting to get really friggin irritating.  And, my eyeballs hurt from wearing contacts every day.

However, the studio is starting to come together.  I built something:

I went around to a bunch of local wine shops and begged off of them their old wooden wine crates.which proved to be no easy feat, as many of them re-use them, never get them save for once a year, or have a waiting list of people who want them as well.  I got some help from my landlords, who own a wine shop in South Pasadena.  I drilled the bottoms of the boxes, then put in rubber stopped, enforced screws.    Honorable mention goes to my friend J, who showed me how to do it, and lent me his drill and level, as well as accompanied me to Lowes to show me which ones to buy.  Whole enterprise?  Cost me nothing but 11 bucks for the screws.  I am stupidly proud of these shelves, you have no idea.

The rest of Allison-land is pretty much same old same old.  The studio is getting there (though have no pictures I am willing to share yet.  but trust me, its coming alonge), film class is awesome and interesting and I’m not failing, so thats good (side note:  Orson Welles, when he wasn’t gigantic (think first half od Citizen Kane?  HOTTIE).  I have a feeling that the remainder of my summer break will be spent watching a ton of movies, and being able to watch them in a new way.  The man of the moment is out of the country for 2 weeks, and I have a feeling I’m gonna miss him and his silly face and his beard and his smiley face emoticons a smidge.  Thats what I get for dating a guy with dual citizenship.  :/

Ok, I am now off to clean, get my car washed, study, and get my hairs cut.  Can I do it?

7:28amHaley

Oh, and Howler Monkey is a Calvinist (Howler Monkey is her cat)

7:29amAllison
?

7:29amHaley
Well, it explains everything

He & Andy fight a lot

because they’re views are so different (Andy is her other cat, whom she believes to be a Communist)

and he attacks the women all the time

because he probably thinks they’re dirty whores.

7:29amAllison

what is a calvinist?

7:29amHaley

John Calvin!

Fire and brimstone

predestination

YA’LL GOING TO HELL!

lol.

7:29amAllison

never heard of him (note…it’s 7:30 in the morning)
7:30amHaley

Eeeep!

Calvinists are totally scary

they believe that everyone is pretty much going to hell

and there’s nothing you can do about it

because god says who will go to heaven

before you’re born
7:30amAllison

…and you believe Howler Monkey is a Calvinist….why?
7:31amHaley

didn’t I just explain above?!?!

Howler Monkey is all fire & brimstone

he’s a bad calvinist though

I even think he may be turning his back on the religion

because of his friendship with Andy

Look, I don’t make the rules here

that’s just the way the monkeys roll