Adventures in Unemployment, Day Fifteen

I learned last night that trying to fall asleep by just turning out the lights and waiting for sleep to come, is NOT a healthy or productive thing for me to do right now.

I go throgh different phases of falling-asleep-patterns.  There are times when I cannot, under any circumstances, fall asleep without the radio on (specifically Loveline…something about speaking voices rather than music, I don’t know, makes me not feel alone.), there are times when I can fall asleep fine without any aid.  A lot of the times, I need to fall asleep reading.  That has been the case lately.  As a result, I don’t think I’ve slept a full night with the lights completely off in weeks, maybe a couple months.  I set myself up in the perfect position, with my wrist propped up, my neck supported… all while in a little nook in my bed.

So, trying to stray away from that last night, was, needless to say, a poor decision.  No matter how tired I am, I feel that being left alone with my thoughts at this point is just unsafe.  I start running through to-do lists, panicking about what is ahead of me.  I start thinking about a particular area of my life where my opinion changes daily, and I just feel sick.  From now on, my head does not hit the pillow without a book in hand.

Yesterday was a HORRIBLE day.  Everything starting breaking or not working.  Problems with my landlord, numerous problems with my phone (luckily, I was up for a new one with Verizon, so, yay for that.), and then, just when I was about to leave the house for a couple hours (I havent left my home in 3 days.), the power went out, so I had to wait for the DWP guy.

Today I had a job interview.  Thats all I’ll say at this juncture.

The apartment is really starting to look empty.  And as a result, Allison is starting to get more sad.


~ by Alli on Thursday, August 21, 2008.

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